Sunday, December 11, 2011


I have been having a lot of strange dreams, encounters, unrelated events that seem to weave into abstracts.  That has been my life.  I have accepted it.  The theme has been belief.  I have hated the word.  I have always seen the lie in the word.  I have been angered by the word.  Believe is a word I have extremely hated.  I have seen beliefs used against people, and I think that has stirred so much anger within me that I have been blinded by the power of my hatred and blinded to the power of what belief means...the real meaning of belief and that is faith. 

There are many in the arts community that hate the religions people follow, because they see the manipulation of these people.  Often, labels are thrown on people, "blind, delusional, weak...etc."  The negative is that they see that this belief often is used against them, in order to empty them of their resources.  Little old pensioners who sign away their estates to a mega-church that gave them love, when their families abandoned them.  Perhaps a belief, that would buy their way into a life beyond the mortal one. 

That is the abuse, a sample of it, that I have totally hated.

I had a strange dream last night.  A dream about belief.  I would not call it a religious dream, a conversion dream, but there were religious symbols in it.  See, I am an odd one, an odd character that screams in conspiracy with the universe because I laugh when I see the magic of it, but I am careful to profess no belief.  So, as I share this dream, I guess I am inviting you into the spectacle that is my mind.  An invitation to, gasp, believe.

In this dream, an odd collection of imaginary monstrosities were figuratively chasing me.  Some of them were vampiric blood sucking bankers.  In order to vanquish them, a sign of the cross was placed on their forehead when they were pinned down to the ground.  I wasn't afraid of them, but I had no belief in the symbol.  So the beastly creature was still there.  Fangs and all, it laughed at me..." don't believe."  I was furious. 

Strange dream.  Strange perspective.  There are times for belief.  There are times for faith.  I sat there contemplating this dream, and flipped on the non-thinking box, to not think about dreams...and caught a portion of the movie "Polar Express".  There were children that didn't believe in the North Pole, or Santa on a dream train of sorts to the North Pole.  Let me not bore you with the retelling, but cut to a character that couldn't hear the music, the sleigh bells or even see Santa until he whispered two words, "I believe." 

Do I laugh?  Absolutely at this point, I have to.  A dream about belief.  I flip on the Television...and belief is the theme.  There was a line about the 'unseen being more real than what is visible.' that caught my ears. 

I could blame all of this on my battles with semantics.  The one thing to understand about have to know where you are.  You have to know where you are going.  You have to BE where you are at.  Those are the anchors.  Are you at the mercy of what you believe?  This is where it gets dicey, because there really isn't anything that is concrete. 

So, this is where love has to take over.  Knowing is really not knowing.  That is how come faith or BELIEF...and I am not talking about anything religious here...but that unknown substance called faith in seeing the whole picture come together...the magic of a unified purpose, really is magic. 

Believe.  Instead of having the stink-eye of seeing the embedded lie, I kind of got it.  By the way, this picture I happened to snap just thinking it was interesting...and somehow there was just something more.  There still is love.  There still is faith.  There is no result without the action in the perfect time. 

Just listen for the thunder.

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